the state of the union

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^^^I put up curtains in my living room last night! I’m making a mental list of “adult” things, and buying a cordless drill is now on the list. also I basically destroyed my wall getting those curtains put up, so stay tuned to find out how much my apartment complex fines me when I move out lolol.

lately I’ve been feeling like I need to share. or at least that I have things to share. and it’s not even anything concrete—nothing that can be put into a list. but I feel like I need to talk about this stage of life— the “young professional, single, far away from anything that used to be familiar” stage of life. maybe not even because anyone needs to hear it (blogs are dead anyway, or something like that, right?), but maybe just because I need to write it for myself.

so this is the current state of life:

I graduated from college in April, majoring in Communications with an Advertising emphasis. I’m now working at an advertising agency in Kansas City, which is almost completely opposite from the city I expected to end up in. I love love love my job. I really like Kansas City. but it’s all been an adjustment. it’s been an interesting past (almost) 5 months navigating a completely new professional and geographic world, figuring out life on my own, and really figuring out who I am as an adult, single human.

it’s been 5 months of figuring out how the heck I’m going to get my sofa up the stairs, going to lots of things alone, wandering pretty city neighborhoods, taking so many wrong turns (where is my Utah grid system?), almost dying about 50 times with the tiny KC freeway onramps (and left onramps??? who do you think you are???), and discovering cool walls/buildings/rooftops/parking garages/hilltops/parks/towns.

it’s been 5 months of learning SO MUCH about everything, and I’m so grateful for all the opportunities and people that have been placed around me here.

so idk what I want to write, but I just want to document life these days. probably mostly for myself. I took this link off my instagram bio so I feel a little more free to write whatever instead of wondering what someone that randomly follows me and clicks the link thinks of all of this. maybe someday I’ll try to make more of it? but for now, it’s a creative outlet/journal/random online spot.

& also, a good quote I found the other day: “imagine what you could do if you started doing something about all you imagine. that’s all.” —Cleo Wade

happy Saturday!

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these days

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^^^ Prospero’s bookstore the other night (a new favorite place in KC!)

things are interesting. it’s been weird not going back to school with everyone else that’s back in Utah. not as weird as I thought it was going to be, but still weird. sometimes I get major FOMO for all the cool things I hear about going on back in Provo.

it’s also weird being in a phase that, for the first time in my life, doesn’t really have a concrete end date. I don’t have an end date for living in Kansas City, I don’t have an end date for being an unmarried person, I don’t have an end date for…really anything. life feels different knowing that at this point any serious progression or movement is really up to me.

but! overwhelmingly, life is a good place to be. I really, really love it here. there are so many things for me to learn in every single section of my life, and I’m excited to see how everything plays out.

the first days

the first few days here all felt a little foggy. I think part of that is because a 16-hour drive through Nebraska is enough to make anyone feel off, and the other part of it was transition overload. the stark reality of what I’d just done (leaving everything and everyone to move to a place where I knew nothing) was sinking in, and all the emotions felt blurry.

so if you ever move somewhere by yourself, give yourself 7 days where you might feel like you’re floating (not in the good way haha. kind of like you just took NyQuil.), but then I promise it’ll go away! and soon enough you’ll have a real mattress and a couch and a schedule and life will feel like life again.

[also, if you ever have to drive 16 hours through Nebraska, I highly recommend bringing your cool best friend. Aubrey saved my sanity.]

but foggy as they were,  here’s what those first days consisted of (mostly for posterity’s sake):

– pizza on the floor. because what else do you do when you move into a new apartment?

– an air mattress on the floor.

– IKEA. In which I disrupted the flow of traffic at least twice and got in people’s way at least twice. But I left with a plant named Hugo and a sheepskin rug (actually idk what animal it’s supposed to be) that I named but later forgot what I named it, among other things, so it was a decently successful trip.

– Grimaldi’s. BLESSINGS that Grimaldi’s has a random KC location. Like, who just puts a Grimaldi’s in Kansas City???

– a rooftop. leave it to me and Aubrey to find a hotel rooftop deck with nobody on it.

– some tears.

– a really sad goodbye.

but even through the weird life-fog those first few days, being here still felt comfortable, and pretty okay, which was a blessing.

moral of the story: moving somewhere totally new by yourself is a weird experience. weird feelings. but get yourself some pizza and some patience with life, and then give yourself a few days and it gets better.

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I’m not a blogger so this post doesn’t even need to be about anything

^^^ Ya you read that title. So here’s a list of things. I’m not even putting a picture.

  1. Natalie Jean just blogged again after a year away, and it’s everything I wanted it to be for her first post back.
  2. I decided that I’m going to buy myself a bathrobe when I move into my new apartment in KC. Because somehow a bathrobe seems like a token of adulthood? Or at least a token of adulthood living in an apartment on your own? Or at least a token of some form of luxury? So ya, bathrobe.
  3. I’ve spent 3 months being sad and sentimental and nostalgic for Utah, and I think I’m done being sad and I just want to move already.
  4. I went to a concert the other night and I decided that I would definitely be okay with dating someone in a band. Long hair, artistic flair, some well-placed tattoos…yeah I promise I’m not kidding, I’d be wayyyy into that. Ok maybe not the leather pants. But all the rest of it, where do I sign up??? Anyone know any temple-worthy kids who check off the “rockstar” box?
  5. Dan Mace on Casey Neistat’s vlogs these days MAKES MY LIFE SO HAPPY. Like, can I order one of him to bring to KC with me to be my friend before I make friends haha? [watch THIS ONE and THIS ONE especially]
  6. Whaaaaat do I even want this blog to be? Do I want it to be anything? Do I need it to be anything?

That’s all! K bye!

 

reality today!

REALITY TODAY!

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living in slight self-consciousness that I maybe smell like a closet because the shirt I’m wearing was commandeered from my grandma’s basement closet. but it’s a rad shirt, so we’re good? also hiiii work bathroom. (side note: benefits of working in an office building with very few females — the bathroom is always so clean, and so empty. and it has a window, so double points for natural light!)

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slowly starting the process of getting rid of most of my possessions so I can fit the most important things in my car when I drive to Kansas City in 2 months. the most important things being my books and my clothes, in that order. also, I’m going to miss my house.

feeling antsy. waiting periods are funnnnn! but it’s also good to have a time where I’m being forced to slow down and savor and be mindful.